Are Formal Sit-Down Dinners on the Way Out at Weddings?

Wedding design is constantly evolving, from the color palette trends that come and go to the ins and outs of wedding party fashion—and the reception meal style is no exception. These days, you have more food service format options than ever, from food trucks to forever cocktail hours. So, what does that mean for more traditional menus? Is the plated and served meal, arguably the most formal of sit-down dinner styles, on the way out? We tapped two wedding planners who bring all kinds of events, from casual to black tie, to life—and they both said no. In fact, weddings are fancier than ever, and newlyweds are relying on caterers for formal plated meals to reinforce that.

That doesn't mean, however, that these alternative styles are unpopular—just that more traditional food service is here to stay. Ultimately, you should choose a meal style that best fits your vision, since the format plays a major part in the atmosphere you create: It defines how much time guests can spend on the dance floor and how the energy flows throughout your event. Take your cues from these meal trends to put together a service style that makes your meal stand out. 

Formal Sit-Down Dinners at Weddings: In or Out?

In short, no, say our experts, who affirm that more and more couples are opting for formal food service over anything else. While the options for post-ceremony meals are more varied than ever, the majority of couples still host a plated dinner during their reception. Experts estimate that only about 10 percent of their couples—or fewer—opt for a different service style, in part because weddings are trending back toward higher levels of formality, but also because plated dinners still provide the best value for your food and beverage investment and are the quickest to serve, letting your guests hit the dance floor as soon as possible. 

“Sit-down dinners are still the most popular when it comes to weddings; typically they are the most time and cost efficient,” says event planner Kelly McWilliams. “This also aligns with the fact that weddings are becoming more and more formal—we have few-and-far-between weddings being planned right now that are not at least black tie-invited.”

Event planner Jove Meyer has seen the same trends from the couples he works with, as they move away from more casual service and return to a more formal, traditional format. "Family-style meals used to be much more popular, even more so than a plated dinner, but I am finding they are swinging the other way again and the plated dinner is back,” he says. “[It’s] what we are seeing most often.”

Though couples are slightly more likely to choose a different food service style for their welcome party, rehearsal dinner, or morning-after brunch, most still defer to the plated meal, says McWilliams. “For pre- and post-parties I would say it’s closer to 60/40, with plated still being a winner,” she says. 

How to Personalize Formal Sit-Down Food Service at Weddings

However, serving a formal plated meal doesn’t mean offering up a menu of dull reception fare. Instead, couples are including unexpected menu tweaks that create unique and memorable dining experiences for their guests. 

Family-Style Elements

Couples who want the communal, comfortable atmosphere created by a family-style service without giving up a formal service are adding individual passed items to their plated menu, says McWilliams. “Perhaps rather than a plated salad, a charcuterie board or salad bowl is passed around the table,” she says. “This trend has me wondering if family style may become a bigger trend in the pre- and post-parties [for couples] that aren’t ready to go as casual as a buffet or stations, but love the intimacy of sharing,” McWilliams.

An Unexpected Starter

Add a four-star detail to your menu plan with a pre-meal bite. “A huge shift that I am fully behind if you’ve got a phenomenal culinary team is starting the dinner service with an amuse bouche,” says McWilliams. “It’s so fancy and unexpected! What a delight for guests to see something that only happens in the fanciest of restaurants at a wedding—talk about elevating the experience,” she says.

Featured Favorites

Instead of choosing the default options provided by the venue—think chicken, fish, and filet—couples are requesting their own favorite dishes or traditional cultural foods as dinner options. “Our clients want their guests to enjoy the food they love most,” says McWilliams. “Sometimes this means serving something that maybe isn’t as ‘wedding traditional,’ such as lobster mac n' cheese, egg rolls, loaded pastas, briskets, and crispy rice.”

Meyer has also seen an increase in personalized dinners. “The menus are getting more creative,” he says. “Gone are the days of a filet and a salmon, [and] we are also seeing the sides move beyond mashed potatoes and carrots to more seasonal, fresh options.” Meyer’s couples have chosen strip steak and branzino, Dover sole and steak frites, and even fried chicken—an unexpected hit. “Just because it is plated doesn't mean it has to be formal—finally, we can get excited about a wedding meal!” he says.

Alternatives to Formal Sit-Down Dinners at Weddings

If a sit-down dinner just doesn’t feel like you, opt for one of these more unconventional styles. “The benefit of having a cocktail-style party, a food [hall] dinner, or a floating supper is that you need less space, as not every guest has a seat so you can fit more people in a smaller venue,” says Meyer. “There will always be guests who need an assigned seat—think of Grandma or a great aunt—and you can reserve a table or two for them, but everyone else is free-flowing.”

Cocktails and Food Stations

For couples who think the best part of a wedding is the cocktail hour, an extensive spread of signature drinks, passed appetizers, and food stations creates a relaxed and festive atmosphere. “A cocktail-style party essentially means no formal seated dinner—instead, your wedding feels like one long cocktail hour, which is most everyone's favorite part of a wedding,” says Meyer. “They get to eat what they want, talk to who they want, and not be restricted to a pre-selected seat for an hour-and-a-half to two hours next to someone they may not know or like.” 

Expect guests to mingle throughout the venue, with some at the bar, some on the dance floor, and some in the lounge. “The energy is spread throughout the space,” says Meyer. “Except for special moments like speeches or dances, guests can do what they like, and they love that!"

Passed small bites and food stations can be just as luxurious and impactful as a plated meal, too: from carving stations to made-fresh sushi, dinner becomes an interactive experience. “The cool thing about stations is that you can incorporate so many kinds of menus that don’t necessarily match,” says McWilliams. “Consider a wedding with a BBQ station, a seafood or seafood station, a Thai station and a Mediterranean station—absolutely something for everyone.”

A Floating Supper

Like a cocktail reception, a floating supper doesn’t require seating for all your guests all at once. “You have a mix of lounge furniture, high tables, low tables, and dining tables, so you can focus your décor around the space and not on dinner table centerpieces,” says Meyer. However, a floating supper trades food stations for server-passed trays of small bites that become heavier and more elaborate throughout the evening—for example, bruschetta bites and tomato soup shooters followed by sliders and mini tacos. “The portions start small and get larger as the night progresses,” says Meyer. “The plates are composed beautifully and full of flavor, but can be eaten in only a few bites—think of it as a floating tasting menu.”

Food-Hall Style

Reference your regular date nights by bringing in food trucks or stations where chefs from your go-to restaurants recreate your favorites for your guests. “Guests serve themselves what they want and enjoy a variety of food for dinner,” says Meyer. Create food hall-inspired seating—”open tables and chairs that are not assigned, so guests flow between the food, the bar, the dance floor, the photo booth, and chit-chatting,” says Meyer. “The energy is much more frenetic and fun as guests control their night in the framework that you create.”