100 Funny Anniversary Quotes to Honor the Person Who Makes You Laugh the Most

In marriage, a good sense of humor goes a long way. When you and your partner can laugh together, it’s easier to defuse tension, smooth stressful moments, and stay on the same team. So while the work of marriage may be serious business, keeping things lighthearted and humourous will allow you and your partner to strengthen your relationship through life's ups and downs.

Laughter is also the best approach when it comes to celebrating your relationship's milestones, especially an anniversary. There are so many things to be joyous about each year you and your partner are together, and commemorating the moment with a cheeky and funny quote, either written in a card or online as an Instagram caption, is a great way to say "Thank you for loving me in every way."

That's why, we put together this list of 100 funny anniversary quotes to include in the personal card you write to your partner, a social media post, or as a jumping-off point for a toast honoring family or friends. From classic big- and small-screen lines to whimsical love song lyrics, and from words of wisdom to comic relief, the tongue-in-cheek words on this list let you add a little laughter to any anniversary celebration—and help prove that the couple who laughs together, stays together.

Funny Anniversary Quotes from Film and Television

• "I know a few things about love. Horrible, terrible, awful, awful things.” —The Office
• "In my opinion, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty... handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with." –Juno
• “We both said I do, and we haven’t agreed on a single thing since.” —So I Married an Ax Murderer
• “If you’re ever with a girl who’s too good for you, marry her.” —Valentine’s Day
• "Marriages don't work when one partner is happy and the other is miserable. Marriage is about both people being equally miserable." —Forget Paris
• “It doesn’t matter if the guy is perfect or the girl is perfect, as long as they are perfect for each other.” —Good Will Hunting
• "She's your lobster. Come on, you guys. It's a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life. You know what, you can actually see old lobster couples, walking around their tank, you know, holding claws." —Friends
• "This is true love. You think this happens every day?" —The Princess Bride
• “You make me happy. Even when you're awful, I would rather be with you, even the you that you seem to think is diminished, than with anyone else in the world." —Me Before You
• “Marriage isn’t about a ring. It’s a lifelong commitment of compassion and understanding. Especially for your spouse’s idiot relations. All is forgiven.” —Chuck
• "I'd be crazy not to turn my life upside down and marry her." —You've Got Mail
• “When you love somebody, you go deaf, dumb, and blind.” —The Way We Were
• “It seems to me that love is everywhere. Often, it’s not particularly dignified or newsworthy, but it’s always there. If you look for it, I’ve got a sneaky feeling you’ll find that love actually is all around.” —Love Actually
• “Marriage is terrifying. It's like flying, you know. You're filled with a mortal dread, but if you find someone you feel safe with, it's like…flying! But if you got someone that is really there for you, someone you can depend on, you're gonna be fine.” —How I Met Your Mother
• “Me: I love you.” “Them: I know.” —The Empire Strikes Back
• "You want the moon? Just say the word, and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down." —It’s a Wonderful Life
• “Even a pain in the ass needs someone to take care of them.” —28 Days
• “Marriage is like a tense, unfunny, version of Everybody Loves Raymond. Only it doesn't last 22. It lasts forever." —Knocked Up
• “Listen to me, mister. You’re my knight in shining armor. Don’t you forget it.” —On Golden Pond
• “After a while, you just want to be with the one that makes you laugh.” —Sex and the City
• “You gotta take the good with the bad. Kids, if you're gonna belong to someone, you better toughen up." — Bluey

Funny Anniversary Quotes from Writers and Notable People

• “My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me.” — Winston Churchill
• “To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the loving cup, whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.” — Ogden Nash
• “Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.” — Benjamin Franklin
• “Marriage is an alliance entered into by a man who can't sleep with the window shut, and a woman who can't sleep with the window open.” — George Bernard Shaw
• “After 45 years of marriage, when I have an argument with my wife, if we don't agree, we do what she wants. But, when we agree, we do what I want!” — Jacques Pepin
• “Don't smother each other. No one can grow in the shade.” — Leo Buscaglia
• “The bonds of matrimony are like any other bonds—they mature slowly.” — Peter De Vries
• “Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.” — H. L. Mencken
• “Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.” — Joan Crawford
• “Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not.” — Albert Einstein
• “Try praising your wife, even if it does frighten her at first.” — Billy Sunday
• “An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.” — Agatha Christie
• “Then there was a man who said, 'I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; by then it was too late.’” — Oscar Wilde
• “We’re all a little weird. And life is a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness—and call it love—true love.” — Robert Fulghum
• “I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. First, let her think she's having her own way. And second, let her have it.” — Lyndon B. Johnson
• “In every good marriage, it helps sometimes to be a little deaf." — Ruth Bader Ginsburg
• “Remember that creating a successful marriage is like farming: You have to start over again every morning.” — H. Jackson Brown, Jr
• “Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.” — Ogden Nash
• “A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.” — Ruth Graham
• "Love is sharing your popcorn." — Charles Schultz
• “A man’s best fortune or his worst is his wife.” — Robert Louis Stevenson
• “I have heard that whoever loves is in no condition old.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
• “Love is an ideal thing, marriage a real thing.”— Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
• “Love like there’s no tomorrow, and if tomorrow comes, love again.”— Max Lucado
• “A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.”— Terry Pratchett
• “Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel.”—Leonardo da Vinci
• “By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.”— Socrates
• "Marriage is like twirling a baton, turning a handspring or eating with chopsticks; it looks easy until you try it." —Helen Rowland
• “Marriage is not just spiritual communion, it is also remembering to take out the trash.” — Joyce Brothers

Funny Anniversary Quotes from Songs

• “When I get older losing my hair/Many years from now/Will you still be sending me a Valentine/Birthday greetings bottle of wine/If I'd been out till quarter to three/Would you lock the door/Will you still need me, will you still feed me/When I'm sixty-four.” —“When I’m 64” by The Beatles 
• “Seven years is a long, long while/Somehow you still make me smile/I'd say almost most of the time.” — “I Like You” by Ben Rector
• “You're sublime/You're a turkey dinner/You're the time of a Derby winner/I'm a toy balloon that's fated soon to pop/But if, baby, I'm the bottom/You're the top." — "You're the Top" by Cole Porter
• “In spite of ourselves/We'll end up a-sittin' on a rainbow/Against all odds/Honey, we're the big door prize." — "In Spite Of Ourselves," Iris DeMent and John Pine
• “I'd buy you Rogaine/When you start losing all your hair/Sew on patches/To all you tear/'Cause I love you more than I could ever promise/And you take me the way I am.” “The Way I Am” by Ingrid Michaelson
• “I'll miss you, kiss you, give you my coat when you are cold/Need you, feed you, and even let you hold the remote control/So let me do the dishes in our kitchen sink/Put you to bed when you've had too much to drink/Oh I could be the man who grows old with you.” — “Grow Old With You” from The Wedding Singer
• “Your love is better than ice cream/Better than anything else that I've tried.” — “Ice” by Sarah McLachlan
• “I neglect you when I'm working/When I need attention, I tend to nag/I'm a host of imperfection/And you see past all that/I'm a peasant by some standards/But in your eyes I'm a queen/You see potential in all my flaws/And that's exactly what I mean.” — “Flaws and All” by Beyoncé
• “If my gray hair shows, I'll be fine/If my waistline grows, I'll be fine/Even when time takes its toll/I'll stay young for the rest of my life/With you, I'll stay young for the rest of my life.” — “The Rest of Our Life” by Faith Hill and Tim McGraw
• “Love is all that I can give to you/Love is more than just a game for two/Two in love can make it, take my heart and please don't break it/Love was made for me and you.” — “L-O-V-E” by Nat King Cole
• “And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me/And at every table, I'll save you a seat.” — “Lover” by Taylor Swift
• "Clowns to the left of me!/Jokers to the right!/Here I am stuck in the middle with you" — "Stuck In The Middle With You" by Stealers Wheel
• “I wanna be your vacuum cleaner/Breathing in your dust/I wanna be your Ford Cortina/I will never rust/If you like your coffee hot/Let me be your coffee pot/You call the shots/I wanna be yours.” — “I Wanna Be Yours” by John Cooper Clarke

Funny but Romantic Anniversary Quotes

• “A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year.” — Paul Sweeney
• “More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.” — Doug Larson
• “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” — Mignon McLaughlin
• "Love is being stupid together." — Paul Valery
• "A good relationship is where each partner secretly suspects they got the better deal." - Anonymous
• "The bravest thing that men do is love women." — Mort Sahl
• "True love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about and few have seen." — Francois de la Rochefoucauld
• "I saw that you were perfect, and so I loved you. Then I saw that you were not perfect and I loved you even more." – Angelita Lim
• “A perfect marriage is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.” — Dave Willis
• “Love one another and you will be happy. It's as simple and as difficult as that.” — Michael Leunig
• “The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.” — Audrey Hepburn
• “I can't see anything I don't like about you.” — Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
• “I love her, and that’s the beginning and end of everything.” — F. Scott Fitzgerald
• “Love doesn’t make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.” — Franklin P. Jones
• "You don't marry the person you can live with—you marry the person you can't live without." — Unknown
• “Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” — Marcel Proust
• “How bold one gets when one is sure of being loved.” — Sigmund Freud

Funny Anniversary Quotes from Comedians and Actors

• “Only married people can understand how you can be miserable and happy at the same time.” — Chris Rock
• “I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” — Rita Rudner
• “Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.” — Henny Youngman
• “Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn't show up on x-rays, but you know it's there.” — George Burns
• “Being a good husband is like being a good stand-up comic—you need ten years before you can even call yourself a beginner.” — Jerry Seinfeld
• “Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?” — Groucho Marx
• “I married for love but the obvious side benefit of having someone around to find my glasses cannot be ignored.” — Cameron Esposito
• “The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.” — Henny Youngman
• "As a man in a relationship, you have a choice: You can be right or you can be happy." — Ralphie May
• “Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.” — Phyllis Diller
• “Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” — Erma Bombeck
• "Look, you want to know what marriage is really like? Fine. You wake up, she's there. You come back from work, she's there. You fall asleep, she's there. You eat dinner, she's there. You know? I mean, I know that sounds like a bad thing, but it's not." —Ray Romano
• "True love is singing karaoke ‘Under Pressure' and letting the other person sing the Freddie Mercury part." — Mindy Kaling
• "A good marriage is like a casserole: Only those responsible for it really know what goes in it." — Unknown
• “They say all marriages are made in heaven, but so are thunder and lightning.” — Clint Eastwood
• “There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.” — Chris Rock
• "Our wedding was many years ago. The celebration continues to this day.” — Gene Perret
• "Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, now that's a real treat." — Joanne Woodward
• “Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.” — Oprah Winfrey
• “You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.” — Jay Leno