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7 Common Wedding Invitation Etiquette Mistakes Every Couple Should Avoid

Read this before choosing and mailing your stationery.

By
Jaimie Mackey
Jaimie Mackey

Jaimie Mackey was the real weddings editor at Brides from 2013 to 2015. She also worked as a luxury wedding planner and produced over 100 high-end weddings and events in Colorado

Brides's Editorial Guidelines
Updated on September 14, 2023 09:50AM
Formal White Wedding Invitation Suite with Watercolor Illustration Detail and Light Blue Envelope

Photo by KT Merry

When it comes to creating and sending your wedding invitations, there’s a lot more to it than sticking a card inside an envelope and dropping it in the mail. In addition to choosing a design that speaks to your overarching wedding style, you'll also need to ensure that all of the pertinent details of your big day are clearly laid out to guests. What's more, it's also important to get the timing just right—from when you order them and send them to when you ask your guests to return their responses.

All to say, your wedding invitations are very important, and getting every detail just right is key. To help you do just that, we’ve compiled a list of the top wedding invitation etiquette mistakes couples make and the advice you need to avoid these common pitfalls. Heed our tips and you'll be well on your way to wedding invitations that are everything you want (and need) them to be.

01 of 07

Putting an Incorrect Start Time

van Gogh-inspired invitation suite with illustrated envelope liner, star vellum overlay, and a gold wax seal

Photo by Olivia Leigh Photographie

While it might be tempting to indicate a ceremony start time that's earlier than the one you've planned, you may want to reconsider that thought. If there is one thing wedding guests know, it’s to show up early to a wedding ceremony. If you plan to begin your ceremony at 5 p.m., expect guests to arrive between 4:30 and 4:45—and to head down the aisle no later than 5:15. If you tell guests the ceremony will begin at 4:45, they’ll arrive closer to 4 and wait an hour to see your grand entrance.

02 of 07

Not Including All of the Necessary Information

modern wedding invitation suite by Minted with curved watercolor details

Photo by Brandi Crockett

A well-informed guest is a happy guest, so make sure to keep your guests in the loop. Specify the date, time, and location of the ceremony—among other important details—on your wedding invitation. If your reception will be at the same location, indicate “reception to follow” to let guests know they don’t need to go anywhere else. If you’re having a reception at another location, you can either include it on the invitation or, more formally, print a reception card with the time and location.

On your information card, you’ll want to include any pre- and post-wedding events, hotel information, and a link to your wedding website. And don’t forget the dress code!

03 of 07

Sending Them Too Late

blue invitation suite engraved with couple's monogram and elegant calligraphy details

Photo by Laura Gordon Photography

Look at your wedding date and count back eight weeks (for a non-destination wedding). This is the latest you should mail your invitations to give your guests enough time to RSVP and make any travel plans. Having a destination wedding? Count back 12 weeks so your guests don’t feel rushed and can shop around for the best travel prices.

04 of 07

Not Providing RSVP Instructions

elegant white deckle-edged invitation suite with RSVP card

Photo by Justine Milton Photography

Don’t forget an “RSVP by” date on your RSVP cards—this one is a biggie. Give your guests three to four weeks to let you know if they’ll be attending. The RSVP date should be at least two weeks before your wedding so you can give your caterer a more accurate headcount. And, of course, let guests know how to RSVP. Include a pre-addressed envelope that they can use to send back their reply, or direct them specifically to the email, phone number, or URL they should use to RSVP.

05 of 07

Not Putting a Stamp on the RSVP Envelope

Blue and white invitation suite with gold wax seal and white florals on blue floral background

Photo by Kelsey Halm Photography

If you want your guests to mail back an RSVP card, make sure the envelope is pre-addressed and includes a stamp. Does this mean you’ll have to buy a whole bunch of extra stamps? Yes, but asking your guests to pay to reply (even if it’s just a single stamp) is an etiquette no-no.

06 of 07

Including Your Registry Information

terracotta-colored invitation suite with curved tops and lace-inspired vellum overlay

Photo by Beatrice Howell

You shouldn’t put your wedding registry information on your invitation, but that doesn’t mean you should ignore it completely. Instead of outlining which stores you've created a registry at on the suite, include the link to your website (not directly to your registry) on an information insert. Then make sure the registry tab on your site is clearly marked so guests can find it easily.

07 of 07

Not Clarifying Who Is Invited

Elegant wedding invitation suite with vineyard envelope lining

Photo by Rebecca Yale Photography

It’s all about the names on the front of the envelope. If you’re inviting a couple but not their children, don’t use “The Smith Family.” Instead, put “Mr. and Mrs. John Smith,” which implies that they are the only two invited. If you’re inviting someone with a guest, be sure to write “and Guest” on the envelope, or put the name of his or her significant other if you know it. Inviting the whole family? Either write “The Smith Family” or “Mr. and Mrs. John Smith, Susie, Alex, and Michael,” with the kids’ names on the line beneath their parents’.

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The Ultimate Guide to Wedding Invitations

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