How to Plan Your Wedding Dances, According to an Expert

While wedding receptions generally involve attendees boogieing down on the dance floor, many nuptials also include special, traditional dances that spotlight honored guests. There's the first dance, where the couple takes their first spin as newlyweds, and the parents’ dance, where the couple enjoys a special moment with the people who raised them. Many nuptials also include lesser-known moments like the anniversary dance, which salutes couples who have been married the longest, and the money dance, where guests surround the couple of honor to slip them some cash—and that's not even an exhaustive list!

Overwhelmed by all the wedding dance options you have to consider? Don't worry, you're not alone: It's normal to feel a bit frazzled when deciding if and when to schedule your dances. Choosing whether or not to incorporate certain family members can be a challenging decision, to boot. You may even find yourself asking, "Should my partner and I do a choreographed dance at the reception?" But before you begin to panic about organizing these special moments, allow us to ease your mind and help you plan a reception that you and your guests will absolutely enjoy.

Here, we asked Reba Browne, who helps run a wedding choreography business, to help provide a few tips and tricks on how to plan your wedding dances (if you choose to have them). Read on to learn more.

7 Tips for Planning Your Wedding Dances

Ahead, we provide a few expert-approved tips on how to organize your wedding dances to create a memorable reception experience.

Narrow Down Your Dance Choices

There are four main dances most couples opt to have at their reception: the first dance, the parents’ dance, the anniversary dance, and the money dance. Different cultures and religions also have their own customs like the hora, a traditional circle dance performed at Jewish weddings, or the raas garba, a night of folk dances that takes place before Indian weddings. Decide which dances are important to you in order to adequately prepare for each moment.

Consider Booking a Choreographer

If you're hoping to perform a unique routine designed by a professional, consider booking a choreographer to help you create a memorable experience. “While it’s obvious that everybody has a different learning curve, we always recommend starting early since things can get crazy as the weddings get closer,” Browne advises. “We also want people to feel confident and comfortable performing which comes with practice. We recommend starting two to three months before the big day.” That said, it's not obligatory to perform a choreographed dance routine. It can be just as meaningful to watch a freshly married couple dance slowly together than to have them twist and turn and leap.

Plan Out the Order of Dances

Most couples like to start the reception with the first dance and the parents’ dances and save the group dances for the latter portion of a wedding. (For instance, the money dance—also called the dollar dance or the apron dance—is usually performed at the end of the reception.) Ultimately, though, the order is completely up to you—just be sure that you have a clear idea of when you'd like them to happen so you can space everything out accordingly.

Always Reach Out to Involved Participants

If you want the parents’ dance or the anniversary dance at your wedding, it's important to give involved participants ample time to practice and choose their music. Unsure who to ask? Here are a few general guidelines:

The first dance is performed by the couple. The parents’ dance is performed by the newlyweds and their respective parents. The anniversary dance can include the longest-married couple in attendance or all the couples married over a specified number of years.

Browne has also seen couples include wider groups in their traditional dances. “We've seen a trend that includes a slow dance by the couple that turns into a high-energy Bollywood/Bhangra performance that includes family and friends and the bridal party,” she says.

Select an Appropriate Song for Each Dance

Choose the music you want for each wedding dance well before your big day to ensure your band or DJ is equipped to play it. Is there a tune that you and your partner listened to during your first date? Did your father regularly sing you a song when you were younger? Find a track that's meaningful to you and your loved ones for this special moment. Also, remember to keep it tasteful and try to stick to songs that are appropriate for all guests to hear.

Practice, Practice, Practice

“I hate to say it but the most important thing is to practice,” said Browne. “The less you have to think about the steps and remembering the choreography, the more you’ll truly enjoy performing and adding in the extras like smiling.” Even if you aren't doing a choreographed routine, it doesn't hurt to practice a slow dance with the love of your life once or twice before you say "I do."

Have Fun 

“On the day of the wedding, everyone’s there because they love you and are celebrating your big day,” says Browne. “So at that point, don’t worry about the steps and just enjoy performing. No one else knows the choreography but you, so as long as you smile and have fun, you’ll be a hit.”

What's more, consider immediately inviting all guests to the dance floor once your one-on-one dances are complete. During the parents’ dance and the first dance, for example, it’s customary for guests to watch as spectators while the guests of honor have their moment. Once those dances are over, however, be sure to encourage everyone to start dancing and partying.