This Is What "No Strings Attached" Really Means in a Relationship

The world of modern, informal dating is extremely complicated. Between hanging out, hooking up, and situationships, there are so many terms used in the lexicon of casual partnerships that it can be hard to know what you want and where you stand with a potential love interest. This especially holds true for "no strings attached" relationships, as many individuals struggle to understand the fundamentals of this type of connection—and what it actually means.

To put it simply, a "no strings attached"—or NSA—relationship is one in which two people carry on a purely physical connection with one another; there’s no vibrant connection between them. In other words, this type of partnership is when two people are sexually intimate, but that’s as far as their relationship goes, and they're not committed to each other in any way. "There is nothing else promised or assumed in the relationship other than the agreed upon type of attachment—usually sex. There usually isn't even an expectation of friendship in these situations," explains licensed marriage and family therapist Bree Jenkins.

But as with all relationships, there are more nuances to this type of connection than just casual sex. That's why we turned to the experts to help us unravel the ins and outs of this dating style. Ahead, here's exactly what a "no strings attached" relationship means, the pros and cons associated with embarking on one, and expert-approved tips to help you decide if this is the right path for you.

What Is a "No Strings Attached" Relationship?

A "no strings attached" relationship is one in which there are no special conditions or restrictions for emotional or physical fidelity or support. The idea behind an NSA relationship is that two individuals can engage in sexual activities, with no rules around dating other people, how often they see one another, or long-term commitments.

"NSA relationship is when people are casually having sex without deep emotional intimacy and no expectation of a romantic relationship developing," Jenkins further explains. While some people in "no strings attached" connections also conventionally "date"—meaning, they will spend time together, go to dinner, or see a movie on a weekend—these activities tend not to be the primary focus of the partnership.

The Pros of an NSA Relationship

Generally speaking, this arrangement works best when you're not actively looking for a relationship but are interested in the physical aspects of partnership: sex. If you have a strong social circle, find your personal and work life both fulfilling and busy, and have a happy family life, you might be less inclined to find a long-term partner and more inclined to connect with someone on a fun, physical level only. If this sounds like something that aligns with your lifestyle, the benefits of a "no strings attached" relationship might include the following:

You’re totally uncommitted.

One of the pros of having a "no strings attached" relationship is that while you get to enjoy a physical connection with another person, there’s no sense of obligation or commitment. Your role is not that of a partner, and rather than providing emotional guidance and support, your time together is strictly physical and focused on fun.

If you're the type of person who doesn't feel ready to settle down, this type of partnership could be the ideal solution right now. "NSA relationships can be low effort, easy to maintain, simple, uncomplicated, transparent and emotionally easy to navigate if everyone involved has clarity, is openly consenting to the NSA dynamic and enjoying themselves," Jenkins adds.

You can pursue different options.

Similarly, another positive aspect of a "no strings attached" relationship is that you don’t have to be monogamous. There's no reason to feel guilty if another potential love interest pops up, and you have the freedom to explore any other opportunity that might come your way. What's more, you could even date multiple people at once.

It can be fun.

Many people involved in NSA relationships enjoy the thrill and excitement of this kind of connection with someone. Specifically, you get to enjoy intimate time with another person and keep things light while avoiding the possible issues, concerns, and misunderstandings that can arise in a more serious relationship.

The Cons of an NSA Relationship

On the contrary, having a "no strings attached" relationship isn’t for everyone, as there are definitive downsides to this type of casual connection. The following are often considered cons to this type of partnership.

You may develop feelings that go unrequited.

If you’re involved in a "no strings attached" relationship, you risk developing feelings for this other person that may not be reciprocated. "Many who have such an open relationship and are ok with it, initially, have a change of heart," says certified Imago relationship therapist Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin. Since it’s not uncommon to find that spending intimate time with someone may lead you to want a more serious commitment from them, you may be putting yourself on the path toward heartache and heartbreak by engaging in this type of casual connection.

It may prevent you from looking elsewhere for a serious relationship.

Another downside of a "no strings attached" relationship is that it may hinder you from pursuing something more serious with someone else. In other words, since you’re spending your time, focus, and energy on casual endeavors, you may be making yourself unavailable to someone who can provide you with a deeper and more meaningful connection. "They can prevent a person from developing deeper connections with other romantic interests since they may create sexually secretive connections with NSA partners," Jenkins explains.

You’re risking your emotional and physical health.

Many people who are involved in "no strings attached" relationships can also end up feeling used, hurt, and unimportant due to the very nature of this kind of casual connection. "While a 'no strings attached' relationship may feel fun in the beginning, it lacks the safety and commitment necessary to form a true meaningful bond with someone," says Slatkin. Jenkins adds, "NSA relationships can be hurtful, and even become unfair if one person feels emotionally manipulated into settling for NSA to have access to a person they desire."

Physically speaking, this type of relationship may also put your personal wellness at risk, too. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), more than 2.5 million cases of new STIs were recorded in 2022, even though it's preventable. The CDC recommends the appropriate use of condoms and certain vaccines to keep you safe.

Can "No Strings Attached" Relationships Turn Into Love?

An NSA relationship can turn into love, though this occurrence isn't very common. "It can happen, but it is less likely since the whole point is to actively not have 'strings' attachment," shares Jenkins. "I always acknowledge that there's an exception to every rule, but the best practice is to stick to the rules and let yourself be surprised if you happen to be the exception. Don't go into an NSA with rose-colored glasses because, for the majority of people, that will be a painful experience. However, you should always leave a little space for magic to happen and not be too stubborn to adjust if the situation calls for it."

How to Know If an NSA Relationship Is Right for You

Be honest with yourself in order to determine if this type of relationship is the right choice at this point in your life. After all, if you’re ready for and looking for a serious commitment, then having a "no strings attached" relationship isn’t going to fulfill your needs. However, if your goal is to keep things light, then opting for a "no strings attached" arrangement can help you stay unattached. "It really depends on your intention and needs for a relationship," says Slatkin. "Do you want a partner or just fun?"

"This can be a good fit for those who want to explore their sexual side without having to meet someone else's emotional needs. It can be helpful to gain sexual experience without the pressure of sexual performance being a deciding factor as a romantic partner," explains Jenkins. "It can be a great fit for those who are not able to be emotionally invested or present for others, but want to have their sexual needs safely met."