What Is a Hen Do or Stag Party?

Even though we speak the same language as our British friends across the pond, there are a few key differences when it comes to familiar sayings and phrases. While Americans refer to the prenuptial celebrations with their wedding parties as bachelorette and bachelor parties, Brits have different designations for these festivities, calling them hen dos and stag parties. But what is a hen do and a stag party? And are they really all that different from the American version?

"Stag and hen parties are exactly the same as the American bachelor and bachelorette parties—a rite of passage celebration for brides and grooms in the months leading up to their wedding," says Holly Poulter, the co-founder of Revelry Events. "In theory, one last wild night with friends before walking down the aisle!" Like bachelor and bachelorette parties, hen dos and stag parties give the bride or groom not only the chance to celebrate their upcoming nuptials, but also to allow their wedding party the chance to bond and get to know each other before the big day.

While a night out on the town or weekend away is a go-to choice for many hen dos or stag parties, modern brides and grooms are also gravitating toward different types of celebrations, including joint hen and stag parties. "Couples are increasingly opting to celebrate together with their loved ones, blurring the traditional lines between hen and stag dos," says Cherelle Joseph, a London-based wedding and event planner. She adds that some couples are also picking more activity-focused events. "Rather than just a night out, many groups are choosing to focus on specific activities like spa days, cooking classes, adventure sports, or creative workshops."

Below, these experts break down everything you need to know about hen dos and stag parties, including the average cost, the history of these rituals, and the guest list.

What Is a Hen Do?

A hen do—also called a hen party—is a gathering of the bride with her closest friends before her big day. What you do to celebrate your upcoming nuptials is entirely flexible—and up to you. You may turn your hen do into a weekend trip or opt to host a night-in with takeout at your apartment. The most important element is spending quality time—and celebrating—with your closest friends.

The History and Meaning of a Hen Do

One of the biggest questions you may have when it comes to the hen do is: How exactly did it get its name? While it's not entirely clear how the modern ritual came to be, the hen is generally considered to be a symbol of motherhood. From ancient times through the 19th century, the hen served as a symbol of ideal motherhood in scripture and literature. And while there’s no record of the first hen parties, we can assume they started happening around the same time as stag parties.

When Does a Hen Do Happen?

Like a bachelorette party, a hen do takes place in the weeks or months before your wedding. This date can shift depending on your schedule, as well as those of your bridal party. If you're planning a weekend away, it may be tricker to find a time that works for everyone, while planning a night out on the town is typically a bit easier to organize.

Who Attends a Hen Do?

"Hen dos and stag dos are traditionally attended by the couple’s close friends and family," Joseph says. "However, it's increasingly common to see variations, such as separate celebrations for different groups (e.g., one for close friends and another for family members)." Ultimately, who you invite is completely up to you. All that matters is spending the day, night, or weekend with those you love.

How Much Does a Hen Do Typically Cost?

"The cost of a hen do or stag party can vary significantly depending on several factors, including the chosen activities, duration, location, and the overall extravagance of the celebration," Joseph says. "It's definitely not a one-size-fits-all scenario." Like bachelorette parties, hen dos can be thrown at all types of price points. You may gravitate toward a simple dinner out at a restaurant with a couple close friends for a under a hundred dollars—or opt for a multi-day trip to another country that reaches into the thousands.

Hen Do vs. Bachelorette Party

There aren't many differences between the hen do and an American bachelorette party. "Both have the same goal—give the bride a great send-off into married life, distract her from the stress of wedding planning, make some amazing memories and have fun," Poulter says. "Both sides of the pond will do this with a day trip or weekend away, group activities, and a lot of booze!"

Like their U.S. counterparts, the women at a hen do often dress up in fun costumes, customized merchandise, or coordinated outfits ahead of the celebration. While many hen nights may involve a lot of drinking, if that's not your preference, you can always opt for more of a low-key type of celebration, such as a spa night, dinner out, or beach trip.

What Is a Stag Party?

Like a hen do, a stag party is a chance for the groom to celebrate his upcoming nuptials with all of his close friends. While stag parties have a reputation for being rowdy and heavy on the drinks, know that your stag party should fit your personal preference. "The best stag and hen dos are when the celebrations are tailored perfectly to the bride or groom—when there's clearly been a great deal of thought put into it to make it really special and meaningful for them, rather than just a generic night of drinking," Poulter says.

The History and Meaning of a Stag Party

While stag parties might appear to be a modern celebration, in actuality, they have quite an extensive history. "Stag parties have their roots all the way back in Ancient Greece, where grooms-to-be would enjoy a night of feasting and revelry the night before the big day—a final night of freedom before settling down," Poulter says. 

The stag is a powerful symbol in mythology, religion, and folklore. In many Pagan traditions, they are seen as symbols of strength, virility, agility, and endurance. The antlers resemble tree branches, which stags wear like a crown. Stags also shed their antlers every year, which may symbolize rejuvenation and rebirth. Early Paleolithic cave art shows men wearing the antlers of the stag on their heads, which suggests that the antlers were used as part of ancient worship ceremonies.

The first stag parties can be traced back to the fifth century, in Sparta, when soldiers would hold feasts and give toasts on the eve of a friend’s wedding. Today, stag parties and bachelor parties aren’t actually that much different from the Spartan celebrations, with the groom gathering all his closest friends for a night of bonding.

When Does a Stag Party Happen?

Just like a hen do, a stag party happens in the weeks and months before your wedding. Depending on the groom's schedule (as well as those of his friends), it may take place over a weekend three months before the nuptials—or consist of a night out just a month before the big day.

Who Attends a Stag Party?

A stag party is attended by the groom's closest friends. Typically, these people are also part of the wedding party. However, it's perfectly acceptable and okay to invite friends who aren't a part of the wedding party to the festivities. Some grooms may also invite close family members to this celebration.

How Much Does a Stag Party Typically Cost?

Like a hen do, the costs of a stag party really vary person to person. "On one end of the spectrum, you have simple, budget-friendly options like a cozy night in with games and drinks, or a day trip to a nearby town," Joseph says. "On the other end, you have lavish weekend getaways abroad, complete with luxury accommodations and high-end activities." When planning for a stag do, consider everyone's financial situation before booking something. What are members of the wedding party able to spend? Are they looking for a weekend getaway or just a night out at the pub? Answering these questions before you start the planning process will allow everyone to stay within a spending limit they're comfortable with.

Stag Party vs. Bachelor Party

Stag parties and bachelor parties look very similar. In the U.K., it's not uncommon for men at stag parties to wear matching costumes when they go out drinking. They’ll go around to different pubs, chanting and singing along the way. The group will try to embarrass the groom, either by putting him in a silly outfit or even pulling pranks on him. Family members, including the groom’s dad, brothers, and cousins, are also often in attendance at stag parties.